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Absolute Best Driving School

"...turning the WORST student drivers n2d BEST!"

Hieu Tran and actual students from various local high schools

The purpose of this blog is to bring awareness and set the highest standards for

our young people (of the world), so that the future will always be better than it is-

coming soon 2009.  xx am by hieu tran, owner and coach.  Titled "the ultimate will, invincible force"

this is continued fro

coming soon. 2009.  xx am by hieu tran, owner and coach.  Titled "the word, the code"

this is continued fro

August 30th 2009.  1:35 am by hieu tran, owner and coach.  Titled "the ultimate reality"

this is continued from the april section regarding "god."  before speaking on this subject, it helps to understand by explaining another subject "time."  time doesn't exist.  it is an illusion.  most things in this world is an illusion, false.  it may be in its state currently, but not long.  you cannot measure time or define it exactly.  all we are doing is pointing a reference onto something and then calling it "time."  it would be more accurate to call it "as a moment passes."  but even that is not accurate.  you cannot pinpoint time, reference it, or capture it in a sense.  "as a

moment passes," is a "period."  some "period" lasts longer than others depending on the energy vibrate, where it is coming from, meaning who you are with and your level of concentration.  now for the word "god" is a title and not an actual name itself.  if you label or identify the most powerful being in all existence and gave it a title, it would be "god."  but that is not a name.  to name it, you would lose the "essence" of it. so truly, we do not know "god" and what it is, only that it exist, somehow and in someway.  it is not visible to us and we have to reach it.  it is not

simply there for us.  in the bible, when moses ask the burning brush who it is, the reply was "iam who iam."  it is un-identify-able.  because "I" is a code (see above section). karma is not exactly "what goes around comes around."  this is a very general statement.  karma is an energy vibe.  all energy vibe has an attraction, like a pocket that needs to be filled.  or like a certain shape that only fits into a certain hole made for that exact shape.  if something bad happens, for example, and you never think about it or even consider it, then that badness will never occur in

your life.  on the other hand, if you notice that badness and comment on it at all, then it will occur in your life, maybe instantly too.  that's energy vibe or aka "karma."  because you took notice of the incident and took possession of it, the next step is to "meet" it, make it somehow occur. this is more deep and beyond my current knowledge and understanding. this so-called karma is extremely technical and works in certain ways, depending on the situation. it is control by your level of concentration and the directions of the concentration.  however, if someone

offend you, you wish them the best of luck and profound happiness; in essence, you are talking about yourself because you do not have it in yourself to wish something evil.  in general, "treat thyself as thy neighbor."  the ultimate reality of all things is to live for yourself.  it is all about "me" and never about you.  this is one aspect of the ultimate realty.  everything you do, you must do for yourself in order to feel good about yourself.  tv, news, current events, whatever does not apply to you at all.  the entire world can crumble, but as long as you live for yourself,

dedicated to whatever you do, then everything will be all right.  you are the moving force that moves all things.  the ultimate reality is that nothing exist.  that you are truly alone in the entire universe.  if i can show your eyes, you would not believe me: at the end of the universe, the lies NOTHING: INFINITE NOTHING--as far and as wide beyond anything!  as a result, you have created all things and everything, so deeply that you do not want to know about it.  the trees, animals and people are all for you, of your own creation.  they are so solid and concrete that they

are considered "real."  the planets, the stars, all fake.  of your creation so deeply.  the ultimate reality is that there is no evolution.  everything is an awakening.  everything that ever happened, that will exist, is already there.  you simply have to "discover" it, realize it.  the knowledge of a vehicle existed thousands of years ago, but no one knew how to build one until about 100 years ago.  whatever discoveries that will take place ten of thousands of years from now, exist currently.  in the future, we will have technologies to extricate our "soul" or energy source and

place it into other forms, such as machine or animals or unknown. we will be able to fly and to zap from place to place.  there will be no more schools or governments.  there will be no more marriages or human sexual reproductions.  no onto another subject: where were you in 1901?  you were in a different dimension.  but doing what is beyond my current knowledge.  as we die, also, we will enter into another dimension.  to do what, i do not currently know.  death is not death but a next step to something else.  it is actually welcomed, not as view the opposite

taught by our society, regardless of how the death occurred.  right now, at this moment there are other life forms that exist that are passing "through" us because of different energy vibe.  once us human beings reaching a certain "level" of something (mental or emotional), then these life forms will be either visible or noticeable to us, perhaps but not likely technologies will reveal the life forms and other "realities" going on at this very moment right in front of our eyes.  ultimately, we are not "humans" but beings in human forms.  you were born of your mother, meaning

of her skin and flesh. but what runs you is not of her skin. by way of her, you have entered into this particular dimension.  you are not what you are named from your parents; that's just a reference point to identify you. this planet earth and all things in it and us humans are very limited.  no matter what, you cannot change certain things, such as your height or your main physical features--no matter how much you believe or wish otherwise!  there is more to all of this that i do not currently understand.  it is said that everything you wish to know and have, you already know and have. it is a matter of you willing to have and know it, meaning realize it. to be continued...

April 3rd, Friday.  12:35 am by hieu tran, owner and coach.  Titled "god"

we are here to live a life of whatever we wish. to experience what earth has to offer.  however, men always wanted to be immortal, possess god-like powers.  to conquer, to dominate, to have more of the same.  but if all things are accomplished to our heart's desires, then what is there more to life or existence?  is that all there is?  therefore, there must be that something else.  something more: one answer to anything.  the closet name to that "something" else is GOD.  What is god?  who is god?  how do we know of this god? so what if we discover god?  then what?

there is a source out there that contains everything to everything that ever was, is and will be.  let's label it god.  in the bible, god is referred to as a word or imagination.  We live in a time-space reality.  if you want something, it will take time.  such as to grow a tree or build a house.  however, god can do anything without the needed time.  in this case, it would be our imagination.  but of course, our thoughts are not things.  or in this case, instantaneous things.  in the ten commandments, god is defined as a goal.  you must have one goal and only one if you were to

accomplish anything.  in a chapter in the bible, god is defined as the "i" in you.  If you say "my" then that is not the real you.  such as my body, my soul, my spirit, my car or my house.  you are the "I."  but what or who is the "i"?  "Iam" is whatever you desire to be or do, and you will have.  God is speed: g-force, energy that can be shaped and form in any ways desirable, like driving 200 mph.  time and space have no affect.  god is details.  he knows everything to anything.  god is the ultimate reality of all things.  if you stripped down life or existence from the beginning to the end of time, what does it all come down to?  god is perfect.  whatever you do, no matter of the time or day or whatever conditions you're in, your result will always be perfect.  aka, the greatest.  your record would be 10 out of 10 all the time.  god is happiness to the fullest extent.  god is a force that creates anything and requires nothing to run on.  to be continued...

April 3rd, Friday.  12:10 am by hieu tran, owner and coach.  Titled "absolute best in any field in our society does not exist"

Why is it so hard to find the absolute best things in life?  if you were to search for the absolute best high school in america, you would not be able to find it.  if you were to search again but this time either in another country or in another time (pass or future), you might find it.  this is one example of the low quality or standards we live by and constantly accept.  Why is it that most parents do not know how to rise their kids?  Why is it that most kids grow up and waste their life?  It is because the structure of most things, especially in america is set up for failure. 

there is no innovation or creativity or evolution in most fields; and even if this is the case, the progress is so slow that it doesn't matter anymore because the importance of that time is gone (meaning you want a fancy car now when you're young and not old).  This is partly the people who govern and the people who accept such governments.  There are no programs or systems that allow an individual or team to stand out or fairly compensate them for their time and effort.  For example, the high school system is a joke.  It is nothing more than a babysitting arena, a

jail ceil to kill time.  Education, when it comes down to it, is opening a book, reading it, answering questions, and asking questions (to ourselves or the teachers).  The end.  If this is too difficult to do, then we as a nation are in serious trouble!  There is nothing wrong with our intelligence, but it is our lack of motivation.  That's the problem.  And this is because we are not fairly compensated, monetary or recognition or appreciation.  Schools should have an elite division where the absolute best in all subjects are completely separated from the others. 

Schools, like colleges, should let the kids choose their classes, teachers, time and days.  The bulk of the work should be done at home or at the library.  There should only be meetings with groups of kids and teachers on a segment basis (once a week or as needed).  Kids progress should be monitor closely (assignment by assignment and test by test).  There should be online video clips from the teachers explaining problems that arise in the subject of their teaching.  If this is done, most kids would spend only a few hours actually on campus.  A reward incentive

is whoever can complete the assignments and battered of tests will move on and graduate early, as early as 14 years old.  In this way, they can get on with their lives, work to build their future.  Why waste time?  Why hold a fully talented mind up semester by semester?  This type of thinking not only applies to high schools, but to the way of parenting or paying government employees or any areas in our society.

December 24th, 2008.  Wednesday.  7:20 pm by hieu tran, owner and coach.  Titled "the hunger"

when i was in high school, i had okay grades.  and no matter how hard i tried, i could not get better grades.  i was not lazy and i was not dumb.  i had the desires and wants.  however, i did not have the BELIEF and a BROAD perspective and TECHNIQUES.  in other words, my eyes were not "opened."  when i went to community college, i got all straight As.  i was never a lazy student or person.  as i gotten better and better grades, i believed in myself and discovered the strategies and techniques to win.  i would ace tests in less than half the time given to me in

almost all my classes.  how?  i read the chapters, re-read the chapters, highlighted, circled and made notes.  sure, it took a long time, but that is how As are achieved--through long hours and hard work.  i would out-write and out-think countless classmates. it is not because i was any smarter, but mainly because i worked harder, had better strategies and techniques on how to produce A papers.  my ways of thinking were sharpened.  there is much to admire when a student studies hour upon hour, does his assignment again and again and again until it "clicks."  it

is like an athletes who does the same repetition over and over until he has it down "cold." (this can be applied to relationships, finance, health or anything else). the great vince lombardi football coach drilled his team until they were in pain.  bruce lee praticed his kicks into the thousands of times per day.  hemingway wrote and re-wrote his words endlessly.  you can sit and watch tv all day, or chat with friends or hang out with them all day, sleep all day or study and study or exercise and exercise.  the man that is admired greatly is the man who produces

deliberate results and outdo himself time and time again.  perspective or understanding, how deep it goes: there are high and low moments after community college.  there were times of not knowing where the next paycheck would come from, where to live, working in warehouses, eating the same food over and over.  this feeling and horrible times are a great reminder or source of motivation of how sweet and fragile life is.  this is why i NEVER missed a day of work--ever--since i started this business in feb of 2005: one man, one company and a ton of

responsibilities.  i appreciate my life, finance, health, relationships build over time and the smartness i possess produced from the tough and great times in my life: experience is the best teacher.  i love driving.  i read driving books all the time, watch driving and racing clips, observe others on the road.  i am constantly improving and improving.  the deep hunger is always with me. destiny knows no rules or laws, man-made or not. 

September 12th, 2008.  Thursday.  3:25 am by hieu tran, owner and coach.  Titled "The Future"

As i continue to coach countless students from all backgrounds and ages, i realize there is an unknown force that i dare not to penetrate. i let it be.  this brings me to the conclusion that in the future, there will be the HAVES and the HAVE-NOTS.   the separate will be extreme. this is why only a few are billionaires and the rest of society are barely making it or just making it comfortably and not really really living our lives, our dreams to the fullest.  for example, i myself am the top 1% driver in the world.  I know so much about driving and continue to learn every day

and continue to improve.  i am so far ahead of society and of my time.  i am the future of driving.  the way i drive and the way of my thinking regarding driving will be the standard of driving far in the future (i say another 75 to 100 years).  one of the main reasons i am so far advanced compare to most street drivers is because i possess the burning desire to improve endlessly, whether it is to predict traffic, predict traffic lights and patterns, turning a corner faster, entering the freeway the safest way possible, or anything else.  the point is i HAVE the desire and

therefore i constantly evolve.  when i drive, i constantly think i am lacking, i need serious improvements.  i am hardly content with myself and my progress. almost all people on the road are the total opposite.  they THINK they are good drivers.  whatever they do, they are comfortably satisfied and therefore have no desire to improve (at least not big, serious improvements--unless something like a personal car accident happens).  So many drivers and student drivers don't have the burning desire to improve or learn much.  this is a common theme with all kids from all

high schools in sacramento.  i don't see much of a difference between kids from low-income high schools or kids from private schools such as jesuit or top well-to-do schools such as rio americano. their driving skills and desires vary extremely slightly. 

YOU MUST PAY THE PRICE is the next topic.  nothing is for free.  and if it is, then its value is very little.  for example, to tap into one's potential, you got to sweat, be exhausted, down and almost out before you start to perform your ABSOLUTE BEST.  this is the law of opposite.  if

you are the worst at a certain thing, then eventually you will be the best at it because there is nowhere to go but straight to the top since you are already at the very bottom of the ranks.  being the worst at something fuels your desire and makes you appreciate things more when you are not at the bottom anymore, like a man starving for water or the sick starving for health.  the greater your desire, the greater the price you must pay.  there are no cutting corners.  you can't want to be a super athlete and be eating pizza and sitting there watching hours of tv.  you

must be in the gym working out, resting or watching films related to your sports of choice.  you can't be a great father and not be home for dinner or not know what's going on in your kids' lives.

our future is not an american future.  that is ridiculous. there are kids in other country sleeping in the streets or selling their bodies for money.  our future is a world future.  america cannot be a powerful and rich nation if other countries are in bad condition or lack in education and

technologies.  if sacarmento is a typical american city and the kids here represent it so, then we are in serious trouble.  i do not see a united effort among these kids, meaning they are not cultured and lack the desire to improve things beyond themselves.  the only thing i see that will save america or unite the world together is a horrible tragedy, such as a meteorite or invasion of some kind.  as you can see, people are losing their houses, kids are doing poorly in school, government workers are being laid off, parents are living from paycheck to paycheck,

businesses are shutting down (and i'm talking about in sacramento here).  i have a vision of a world where there is no usa or mexican citizens.  everyone is a world citizens.  i see people marrying each other because there is chemistry and not the color of their skins.  i see a future where driving is synchronized, aggressive, vehicles with 1000s of horsepower, drivers predict each other's moves and most importantly, NO DEATHS.  i see people knowing multiple languages as a standard, traveling freely from one end of the world to the other for business and

personal reasons, public schools are eradicated, and education is computerized and group sessions are held often, kids working with parents at work and learning how to drive when they are 10 years old (but not licensed until 12 years old), there is no more big corporations but free enterprise--everyone has their own home business and the best one of them will survive, there is more emphasis on the individual (meaning one single person can change everyone's entire future), sports will not be a white or black thing but the best will rise and the so-called reputation

of the ones will fall (ufc or strikeforce is an excellent example and nascar would be a horrible example).  i see a limited tv, as used to mainly inspire people or as social and psychological study of certain group or of a discovery of one's self.  i see religions as being demystified and clarified and being viewed from a sociological, psychological and philosophical perspectives instead.  i see the world as every individual strive to better themselves each and every time in their chosen tasks and that everyone is well-read and extremely competent in their field.  but none of this will ever happen if there is no desire to do so.  and the only way to bring this desire about is a sad tradegy from beyond.  and i am talking about 250 to 300 years from now as IT will only begin.

July 11th, 2008.  Friday.  3 am by hieu tran, owner and coach.  Titled "God of the Streets" (the highest possible level of driving: not beginner, intermediate, advanced, or expert)

if i do one thing well, i will do all things well.  i teach automatic transmission, coupe vehicles only.  NO ONE understands what driving requires, especially great driving. and it is not just "driving" but something more, something beyond, unexplainable.  to be truly awaken in life, to be one

with god, you must be god (not literally but a reflection of god in a sense).  the first step starts with desire.  desire to be better and better, to go so far that there are no levels left to master.  what comes next is the details, the mind (intellect).  for example, let me give you a full and

complete explanation of a not-so-simple "normal" lane change.  first you have to know where your blind spot is at.  It is over your shoulder, toward the corner (not the front or middle part) of your rear side window (either left or right, depending which lane you plan to merge into).  (no sun glass, hat, hood, or jewelry, blue tooth, earpiece, or tinted windows. all are distractions and add time, slowing you down.) the mirrors are not a main concern because whatever appears in them are obvious; meaning your eye moments are minimal vs looking over your shoulder.  you can

catch the images (mainly other cars) in the mirrors quickly and with little effort; the mirrors are like a great big sun, and the vehicles are like obvious shadows when they do appear.  although you can use your mirrors, you MUST check over your shoulder (blind spot) no matter what.  Or you will crash.  It will only be a matter of time!  a crash will happen!  when you do look over your shoulder, you want to do it QUICKLY or else you WILL crash in front of you.  you DO NOT want to take your eyes off the road, even for a second.  anytime you take your eyes off the road,

you WILL crash.  with this thought in your mind, you want to check your blind spot as quickly as humanly possible.  so now at least you know EXACTLY where to look.  there is NO guessing, but only getting used to (conditioning).  HOW you check is extremely important as well.  you must minimumized your head moment.  it is your neck that moves to a slight angle and from that point, your peripheral vision (the corner of your eye) takes over and from this point, your intellect takes over; meaning, you know exactly where to look (the corner of the rear side window)

and if there is no car there, it is clear to BEGIN to merge (if another car from a couple lanes over decided to quickly get into your intended merging lane, then you must merge back into your original lane).  in order to keep the neck moment to a minimum, the shoulders and arms must come into play (join together).  your shoulder must come off the seat (now you are involving your chest, stomach, upper and lower back) slightly in an angular position.  while you're doing this, the steering wheel must not move, or else you will hit something or another vehicle (if there is

one unexpectedly).  the only exception is that if the road is curved, then you will have to steer the wheel with the road, remaining centered in the lane as much as possible.  to keep the steering wheel stabilized during this the process, the greatest pressure applied must come from the fist, wrist, elbow and forearm while the rest of the used muscles (previous mentioned) must be loose and flexible.  when you actually steer the wheel, it is best to use one hand because of the moments of all the muscles i mentioned, using two hands will throw everything off and thus

cause the steering wheel to move more than it is intended (technique).  the steering wheel should not move more than 1/2 an inch at MAXIMUM.  if you want to lane change faster, you speed up more and not steer more.  of course, the faster your speed, the less you steer (which is better).   now that you know where to look and which muscles to use and how to use them, let's talk about speed.  first of all, do not slow down!  there are exceptions though, like if there's a car in front of you.  but generally, do not slow down, especially if there's a car in the lane you

wish to merge into.  if that car is far back enough, you may maintain your speed.  however, if he is close to you, then you must speed up.  therefore, speeding up is the best choice (at least for the moment of getting into the intended lane).  a clarification here: increase in speed really means increase in sudden, explosive gas pressure or RPM.  if you cross two lanes, it will take you longer if you maintain your current speed; therefore you need to increase your speed just to be equal to the vehicle already two lanes over and behind you (concept).  And you must

increase your speed even more to increase the distance between you and the vehicle two lanes down behind you.  if a car is BEHIND you, you may lane change.  Simply speed up more to get in front of him.  However, if there is a car NEXT to you, then do not lane change (this is a concept and not a technique or strategy).  now reminder, i am talking about a "normal" lane change, where the road is straight and you're either on the far left or right side of a multilane city streets or freeway.  now, all of these details is useless if you forget one thing that precedes it

all: the constant awareness of what's already had happened seconds or minutes prior to the your decision of lane changing.  you must be aware of your environment and where every car is at, how fast they are going, where they will be going, and how long it will take them to get where they want, how long will they keep their current speed, if any other elements will affect their speed and decision (such as a cop or young racer on the road). if you really think about it, lane changing (like cornering) is an illusion.  you are not really "lane changing" but going in a straight

line, bit by bit.  the is no circular motion involved, but one straight line (millimeter by millimeter).  it is like waving a pencil quickly, thinking it is bending. or like dropping a penny in a glass water and thinking it has increased in size.  there you have it, my friend.   this is a complete and full explanation of lane changing.  And i did not include foot pressure techniques, legs and body positions and mirror arrangements.  also, i did not discuss the emotional charge involved, the predetermined psychology involved, the conditioning drills, the philosophy of changing lane (the reasons) or the details of space and distance.  in the end, this is only to give you a glimpse of a "normal" lane change.  Now, imagine other maneuvers, such as turning right/left, parking, freeway merge and endless others!!!  if God the almighty were to drive, this is how it is done!

July 11th, 2008.  Friday.  1:45 am by hieu tran, owner and coach.  Titled "the YOU in US"

every comment you make, every action you take, every emotion you feel, or every thought you ever had regarding something (the objective), it is all about YOU.  If you dislike someone, it is because that person reminds you of something about yourself (another part of yourself).  By disliking that particular person, you are (though unaware) trying to correct yourself, bringing more awareness to your conscious self.  It is NEVER about them but you!  When you chose to focus something negative about someone, it is YOU (the real self) who you are actually focusing on.  But in this case, it is easier to dislike others instead of yourself.  Instead, bless the person, let them be, and wish them the best of luck.  Of course, it is YOU who you are blessing, being, and wishing the best for.  Remember, it is all about YOU.  It is NEVER about them.  It is YOUR feelings, thoughts and actions.  The objects are the reflections of certain parts of you (be it past, present or future).

June 25th, 2008.  Wednesday.  12:45 am by hieu tran, owner and coach.  Titled "the being vs the system"

after training countless people, i realized that it is not the techniques, strategies, or training that makes one to be the best at what he/she does (though it is part of it); instead, it is the sole belief and that continued belief, regardless of the outcomes (true or false), time after time.  you can set up the same training program in any profession and get different results from some individuals.  if the system or duplication is that simple (solution), we would have no poverty, crimes or sickness.  It is like saying if you copy a champion boxer's training routine, then you too will be a champion.  if this is true, then everyone would be a champion boxer (if he is willing and dedicated).  but in reality, this is false.  this is why an individual is extremely important.  once the being is gone, that's it: the end of something great.  no system, however great it is set up, can beat (its desire vs the individual's) the being (individual).

there are forces (known and unknown) of the universe that align themselves with the being to accomplish a certain purpose.  The purpose is greater than all things.  The purpose is pre-determined (by whom or what is unknown).  The process may seem chaotic, but the end result is achieved and that's what counts: there is no choice.  Everything revolves around this pre-determined purpose to the end.  Some examples: martin luther king, abramham lincoln, bruce lee, vince lombardi, jack dempsey, and whitney houston.

May 12th, 2008.  Monday.  12:30 am by hieu tran, owner and coach.  Titled "the master key to all of life's success"

it amazes me that countless teens do not know what it takes to succeed in life or in anything.  that there is no such a thing as "jack of all trades" but instead "okay at everything" and "great at nothing."  if you are great at one thing and that one thing only, the way (process) you got there, then that is the "key" to get anywhere else--regardless of the task or subject (sports, cooking, relationships, money, health, etc.)  people do not understand that to master anything in life, first of all, it can't be "mastered."  you can only get damn near close to it

(evolution is constantly changing).

to be a master, it takes time and details and repetitions and mistakes and wisdom and determination.  you can do the same task 10,000 times and yet, every time, it is different.  like watching a movie.  when you watch it again, you see something different that you did not see a few days ago.  life is never exactly the same.  one of the best things to do is to ask questions: "what am i doing, how am i doing it?"  and the best question is "how can i do it better or greater?" and you must ask these questions endlessly, too!

life  requires countless (millions) repetitions (and therefore time) to conquer (master) something: such as hitting a homerun all the time, reading a thick book straight through in one setting, turning a perfect corner after a long day's work or at 2 in the morning, or having a wonderful relationship with that someone every time you see them.

the lack of awareness and action of the mentioned requirements above cause the "rich to get richer" and the 1 percent to dominate the 99 percent in this world.  this is ridiculous!  we have no one to blame but ourselves!  ignorance and laziness must not be passed upon to another being. and the best example, is YOU.

May 11th, 2008.  Sunday.  11:30 pm by hieu tran, owner and coach.  Titled "all problems lie with the parents"

over the last 3 years since i became a businessman and not an employee, my view, awareness and conscious changed and expanded concerning the society we live in.  i discover the single greatest problem with our teens today has to do with their parents.  i continue to teach kids who do not know how to drive, can't follow directions, can't take feedbacks, can't learn from their mistakes, have low self-esteem, self-image, self-confidence, low standards, and exist merely for the next day.  the blame for this lies with the parents.  most parents don't know how to raise their own kids.  parents don't know how to communicate to their kids, teach them respect, disappointments, high standards, how to listen and follow directions and not to give up, to better themselves as each day passes.  this is true in ALL teens, regardless of their economic and racial backgrounds. 

for example,  when a kid come home from school and works on his school work, the parents will disrupt them.  this shows that eating or cleaning up is more important than education.  (the food or messy house can wait.  the friends at the door can wait.)  what is happening is that the parent is teaching the kids (indirectly) that education isn't important.  when the parents do this, it breaks the kid's concentration.  in the long run, he does not know how to concentration for a long period of time and his level of concentration isn't highly cultivated.  and the parents wonder why he is felling school!

another example, the parents forced the kids to eat their entire plate during dinner or whatever meal time.  this demonstrates that a $10 meal is more important than the kid's self-esteem and assertiveness (by saying "no").  she is eating NOT because she is hungry but because she is forced too, because "other kids in other country are starving" (who cares, because you can only help what you do and not other people around the world).  and when the kids gains weight, she feels bad about herself, blaming her lack of willpower to exercise (not her bad eating habits taught by her parents)

another example, when a teen asks his mom to take him somewhere or to do something for him, she says "later."  this becomes a endless, expected reaction to the point that the teen has no confidence, trust or belief in their parents.  eventually, communication shuts down.  this demonstrates that whatever the parent is doing or however the parent is feeling, it is more important than what the teen desires.  this kills his self-worth and motivation and invites laziness and depression.

another example, when a kid wants to buy something and the mom says wait until it's on sale.  this shows that an item (say $100 shoes) is worth more than the kid's desire and self-worth.  that his life is a discount and that's how he should live it.  also, this puts a log in his burning desire to attain his goal.  as a result, in the distance future, the kid sets goals but doesn't achieve them because those goals are too hard (too expensive).

as a result of these examples and among other things, when the dad starts to talk to their teen, the kid reacts in a negative way, like "WHAT?!"  and the father wonders what the heck is wrong (talk about lack of awareness).  this is the resentment building up over all the "laters," "eat the entire meal," "put your books down and vacuum" and "let's wait for a sale."  in a broader view, the kid is taught "ask and you will be put down," his "no" (don't want to eat), means "yes", and that life is a "forced-to-do things" and not a choice (freedom and will instead of pre-destined).

your kids are an extension of yourself.  however, the question is: which part of you are the kids growing into: best or worst?

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